Corona, The Online Sex Work Economy And Giving Back

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It is quiet. The streets are quiet. The park. The neighborhood in which I live lined with lovely homes. Even my favourite grocery store, which on any given day, is filled with a sort of bustle and buzz that makes me happy. The Corona Virus, AKA COVID19, and subsequent stay at home orders have been the reason for the worldwide shutdown. The economy is stumbling downhill and the US is just holding its uncomfortable breath hoping, waiting.

The shutdown has affected every person with a workplace to go to. And the new normal of face masks, bandannas, avoided eye contact, lack of the usual social gatherings have changed us forever.

There is a sector of the economy, though, that isn’t very much effected. The online sex work economy is the one in which I am involved. It is vast, it is varied, and it has been stable for me for the last 15 years. Stable might not be the right word. My income has increased every year since I began my work online. I am fortunate, during these strange times, my business is booming.

An Online Webinar Being Provided For The SW Community

My daily routing of work has changed little. I am an online dominatrix and fetish content producer. I have worked from home, been my own boss, run my own business, paid my taxes, and produced my own fetish content for so long, this shelter-in-place routine has me busier than ever because of reasons one wouldn’t suspect. But nearby, sister businesses that hosted in-person providers, community BDSM events, and community classes like mine have closed down. Like so many venues, they are struggling to pay their rent.

Talking to some of my colleagues, I realized the kind of struggles that they are going through. Travel plans, including tours, have been canceled. They cannot see clients, they cannot rent out their space for workshops. And some of them have come to me asking for help.

When I was teaching workshops in person, the questions were always similar to the ones I receive now. Do you really make all of your money online? How do you manage so many platforms and so many profiles? How do you keep contact with your clients? Now, the questions have intensified because their own situations have intensified. Those who have worked online before are trying to manage, albeit under duress, because all of a sudden, online work is the only work they have.

What quarantines and lockdowns have shown us is that varied sources of income is necessary. By “us”, I mean sex workers. This umbrella term is truly vast. I am an online sex worker with a legal registered business. Many are in-person sex workers, or a mixture of the two.

I had this demand for teaching women how to work online when I started teaching workshops in person. When I saw 2 of my favourite BDSM spaces struggling, I couldn’t stand by and do nothing. So, I decided to do two things and hopefully hit both with a single stone. I decided to make these months in quarantine a time of education and support.

One of those ways is through the writing and online publication of a best practices guide for a particular platform called Sext Panther. It monetizes texting and online content like photos, videos and phone calls. I had reached #1 on the site several times, and started writing down what was working for me. 1 page turned into 10, and then I decided to self publish.

Another way to give support was to teach classes. My new class will be a webinar, so I’m making my experience work for me. An online class to teach about how to work online. There are so many skills involved in this work. Content production, marketing, the art of conversation, modeling, acting, human psychology, sexuality. The list goes on. But we all have to start somewhere, and as the old adage goes, I wish that someone had shown me all of this information when I started.

All of the proceeds from “The Sextpanther Best Practices” document that I wrote are going to SubRosa. All of the proceeds from my “So You Want To Make Money Online Through SW – level 1” online class are going to Nightshade Sanctuary. So, not only can people find new ways of making money online, these spaces will receive the funds.

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Mz. Kim attends the 2020 AVN Awards

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AVN awards red carpet MzKim Asian Dominatrix
press photo from getty images

2020 Adult Video News Awards – Arrivals
LAS VEGAS, NEVADA – JANUARY 25: Mz. Kim attends the 2020 Adult Video News Awards at The Joint inside the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino on January 25, 2020 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Gabe Ginsberg/Getty Images)

Oh AVN. Thank you for having me walk the gauntlet, also known as the red carpet. It’s a fascinating event. The red carpet, in this case, was very very long. And intimidating.

The line began outside. And outside was where the inevitable Jesus protestors used a bull-horn to try to save us. Our line went right out to the street and right in front of them. I felt tense, but at least there were police officers standing nearby. There was a barricade but I had no idea why AVN organizers put the path out to the sidewalk, right in front of these protestors. To add to the chaos, there was a protestor to the protestors! He made his own sign. It said, “Pray The Straight Away! Thanos Is Lord.”

Last year, there were protestors at the major intersection in front of the Hardrock entrance. They had bullhorns, and no fence. We walked by them and stood next to them waiting for the light to change. Two of them shouted at us, and got really close. There was a feeling of violence, of real hatred towards us. This was the kind of moment that made me afraid that I might get shot. Just for being me. Even now, I feel angry and sad. I have a right to exist, just like them. I have right to make a life the way that I see fit.

Back to the experience on AVN red carpet… this carpet was long. It stretched from one end of the hotel to the other. There were crowds on both sides of the ropes. Hundreds, maybe even thousands of women and men, all with phones and cameras, taking photographs and looking at us. Some just curious, some avid fans waiting for their one and only. And I, having been nominated in a very niche category, Favourite Domme, was just there somewhat as cattle, somewhat as entertainment. To shed some light into my part in the event, I was 1 of 50 nominated in this category. Almost takes the fun out of being nominated at all. Almost.

I had come to Las Vegas to teach my workshop, sit on an AVN panel about independent content production, and to make content. And of course, to walk the red carpet. It turns out, I was in line right next to Stormy Daniels. MzKim attends AVN awards 2020

I would never have recognized her because of her goth get-up that night. I saw some exquisite women, and loved being seen by them as well. The sheer chaos of it all, the walking, the many beautiful women, some breathtakingly so, and the crowd… this was the experience I had signed up for, and I got it in spades.

There was a separate media room, of which I was not privileged enough to go in. This was where the winners and presenters would do interviews and additional photographs. As I was placed in front of the long line of photographers and cameras, they move you through to the tune of a bell. An actual bell that someone rings so that people know when to move on to the next group of photographers.

It’s easy to feel small and insignificant in a place like this. The fanfare, the inner circles. AVN is porn-centric, and yet all sorts of sex workers come to party, to work and socialize. I have to remind myself that my life and value does not hinge on my fame, or lack there of. Although, for a porn network to even have a category called “Favorite Domme” shows that there is recognition from this industry that we do make impressions and waves.

Was the effort worth all the trouble? Yes. And, as always with things like this, dressing up was the best part. I got to stretch my style muscles and put together an ensemble that I really loved.

With the crew: Ceara Lynch and Princess Camryn

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How To Be An Online Content Producer AKA Online Dominatrix AKA Boss

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How did I come to teaching a workshop called, Monetizing Your Appeal Online: Content, Business Strategies for Models, Dommes? How does one become an online domme, or fetish content producer, or their own boss? Why do I want to share this valuable information?

I am an actively working Asian Online Dominatrix.  So, I don’t just teach it, I live it, I work it. This story begins at DomCon. Yes, there is a convention for everything. I saw that most of the women who attended were in-person dommes. And when they found out about my work and my specializations, they were surprised to find out that I could make a very good living doing only online domination and online content production.  They had lots of questions and preconceived notions about what it takes to do this work. 

“I really like the in-person connection, I just don’t think you can have that in online domination.”
“What kind of services do people pay for?”
“How do you dominate anyone without being in front of them?”
“How do people find you?  How do you find clients?”

I realized that many professional dominatrices were intimidated and perhaps embarrassed that they did not know how to work online.   I also realized that people from all sorts of backgrounds wanted to learn how to do the work that I do. 

I also realized how invested I am in helping others through these classes because this work has given me so much.  The life that I am able to live is made possible by this work.  The life I left, in which I was terribly abused, was made possible by this work.  The woman I am, the confidence that I hold, the relationships I have developed with other bad-ass sex workers… all of this is made possible by this work.  So, teaching how to do this work finally made sense.  It was time to pay it forward.

Here lie the true reasons behind sharing all of this knowledge and information… not just in being bossy to other people.  Putting the intelligent work into my business has given me a sense of self, growth, autonomy, creativity, confidence and success.  I thought, how great would it be if others could find the same freedoms, creativity and money & fun?

What makes my online business successful?  It’s a mixture of making brutally honest self-evaluations; prioritizing content strategies; gathering tools, assessing costs, honing skills. Last but not least, really loving the work that I do, the freedom it provides, the autonomy and creativity I have in my own life. I am my own boss. And the boss of many.

From start to finish, the workshop is about 3.5 hours of a beginner’s class followed by an advanced class.  I teach the basics of sex work, the start-up costs & necessities, self-evaluation, online content, strategies and marketing and what actions to take. Then, I tailor the advanced class to the participants after getting a feel for the levels at which they are already working.

Figuring out how to get all of this in a presentation that isn’t a complete snoozefest was a challenge.  I didn’t want to just stand there and lecture.  Fortunately, I am able to pepper in lots of stories and real-life anecdotes that seem to get everyone engaged and laughing. 

One of my students & friend, Stella Sol, wrote this, “I really enjoyed your class in SF & have been busy ever since b/c I’ve been taking your advice. I am already seeing a dramatic increase in my traffic, income & understand of online marketing.”

Another wrote this. “When teaching, Mz. Kim brings an incredible level of presence, professionalism, and information to her classes. Along with being organized, she has a diverse knowledge base that is eternally fascinating to learn from. As a teacher, Mz. Kim does an excellent job of tying in personal anecdotes and humor that enrich your learning experience. As a coach, Mz. Kim is thoughtful and inventive, and you can feel that she truly wants to help you achieve your goals. I am grateful for the wisdom Mz. Kim has shared with me.”

These reviews bring such an immense feeling of satisfaction. 

There was something that stood out of the workshops I have taught.  Community.  Sex work can be isolating.  That’s part of the draw, actually. So, that’s the double-edged sword. We can work alone, and be left alone.  But then, we are alone.

The sense of community and meeting others in this industry has been an essential part of my own growth and I think a welcomed relief to many of my students.  No person is an island.  There are things that others can teach us so that we do not have to re-invent the wheel.  By providing these workshops, I have given an opportunity for people to get together and meet others.  They come to learn the contents of my class, but they leave with a larger sense of community. 

Another of the limitations of this work is stigma.  It can weigh down on us in ways we don’t realize.  From not being able to use easy payment processors to not being able to post ads on Facebook; from having photographs and content constantly taken down on Instagram or Tumblr to having negative reactions from significant others and their family members, stigma in this line of work is real.  Talking to others dealing with the same issues, and sharing solutions… this is something valuable that a real-time class can provide. 

I wish that I had this kind of class when I was starting out in online sex work.  And sometimes, it’s been hard to show SWs that this class can be useful to them.  This kind of education isn’t as glamorous as a hard-skills class.  A choking class like one I took recently from Domina Snow, a personal friend and colleague, would be considered a hard-skills class.  I haven’t used this choking skillset nearly as much as the “Deep Work” segment of my own class.  As Snow said, “We always teach the most important things that our younger selves needed to know, but it never seems to be received with the same value.” 

Still, I hope that more people and SWs will let me teach them. Once they step into my workshop, they will see just how valuable this information is. How important it is to meet others in the same community. And I hope that I will get to hear how this work has changed their lives as they have changed mine. 

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Mz Kim to Teach Las Vegas Class in Online Content, Strategies for Models, Dommes

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Las Vegas, NV — Mz. Kim, 2020 AVN nominee, will teach a two-part workshop for online business, building content and marketing strategies for clips performers, models and Dommes.

Kim was recognized as an upcoming 2020 AVN nominee for Favorite Domme as well as XBIZ Rising Clip Star nominee earlier this year. She is holding the class on January 21st, 2020, from 1 to 4 p.m. (PST) at the Studios, described as “a boutique fetishspace for private play, education and photography.”

The world of online sex work is complicated and fascinating. Being a true professional in this industry takes creativity, discipline, focus, entrepreneurship and a love of human sexuality. Mz. Kim has done this in spades and it shows in all of the paths she has taken to stake her own digital real estate in the fetish online market.

Mz. Kim has taught this workshop numerous times and is looking forward to teach more women the valuable skills necessary to make a living and a business online.

“I have been a professional online Domina of 15 years and I have put together this two-part series to harness your potential to maximize and monetize your online presence,” said, Mz. Kim.

For more information and to sign up for the classes, read the details and purchase tickets at the website here and follow Kim on Twitter.

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How Art & Smut Get Made

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This is how art & smut gets made. I consider some of what I do artistic in nature, and this is definitely one of those instances. This took 4 people and quite a few man hours. Not to mention the planning, the location, the wardrobe. All so I could satisfy mine (and many others’) fetish cravings…

When I collaborate, I choose carefully. My time is valuable, and I respect the time of other artists, too. That’s why I appreciate it when like-minds come together. The two other women you see here are Andrea Rosu and Stella Sol. They are not just pros in this industry, but creatives as well. They constantly inspire me, and I ask their opinions often.

The pet you see in this photo, he’s special, too. He belongs to Stella. And it was a pleasure to play and pose with someone so keen to please. My heart fluttered a little when we both put on our masks, I wore the black bunny one, he the dog mask, and we had a tender moment. I bent down to adjust his mask, and caressed his face. I don’t know how it felt for him in that moment, but I remember it to be quite special.

I think a lot about what collaboration does for me. In money terms, the video content that I publish involving others (that is, myself and 1 or even 2 other women are in the same scene) do not do that well. My best selling content is always solo work. However, I continue to push for special collaborations because every time I work with other women, whether they are versed in the same niche categories as I am, I learn something new and valuable. I am inspired to make something different. And it’s always valuable.

The workshops that I am teaching incorporates this idea of collaboration. I would venture to say that all SW is pretty isolating. If it’s the kind of work that involves seeing clients, then there is another person involved. There can be some intense feelings of loneliness and isolation sometimes. Many SWs also don’t ask other people in the industry sincere, thoughtful questions. 

I learn the most when I ask people about their experiences and how they have come to the successes they have made. People also don’t like to talk about money, or they don’t speak truthfully about it. I find that to be a real detriment to people in this work. I am all about financial literacy and transparency and cutting through the mud to get to the nugget of things.

So, art and smut get made like this. We learn from each other, we develop our skills and transform ourselves into fetish bunnies walking our pets at the local park…

You’re welcome!

To see this video “How Art Gets Made”, please click here to join my Onlyfans. It’s how I primarily communicate with those who value my work. It’s an inexpensive subscription fee and it’s a great way to see lots of my content!

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The Best American Dream Interview

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Ynotcam interviewed me. I really like the it turned out.

Here is an excerpt.

What should a domme who is not yet online in any big way professionally know to help set them up for success?

This is a big question and requires quite a bit of time to discuss — so much so, that I put together a class to cover this subject called “Monetizing Your Appeal Online.”

One of the first things I ask people to do is identify their strengths and their skills. Then I ask them to think about what they like to do. Where those two areas meet is the focus point of their path.

Because everyone is different, I never give specific professional advice until I get to know their individual situation. What I would say is that grouping cam and clips together is a mistake. They are both online work, but making clips and being on cam require different skill sets. Presenting an idea and recording it is different than being live on cam with a client. The stage-fright or simply trying to come up with things to talk about in a live cam session is a different issue than not knowing how to act in front of a camera. As a general rule, I would also say, practice takes the edge off of everything — practicing on webcam, practicing acting, practice improvising.

Mz. Kim has classes upcoming in Portland, OR (December 7) and in San Fransisco, CA (December 14). Click the links for more information.

To read the full interview, click here.

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AVN Nomination: Favorite Domme

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I was nominated for Favorite Domme for AVN 2020. I have been on their website for some time, and wondered whether or not the self-propelled pre-nomination process would truly do anything. But, here I am, a nominee, and I am nominated and placed right next to the OG Nina Hartley. I think that I’m more excited for that than anything else.

So, I’ll be attending the AVN awards and AEE Adult Entertainment Expo as a nominee this year. Voting closes on Jan 25th and I fully expect to lose. The point, though, is that I will be there to work, to teach, to play, and hopefully meet some excellent people. And walking the red carpet will only add to the fun.

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Mz Kim to Teach San Francisco Class in Online Content, Strategies for Models, Dommes

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I am teaching a 2-course workshop in San Francisco!

Saturday, December 14
Monetizing Your Appeal Online
Course A: 12-1:45 PM
CourseB: 3:00 PM – 4:45 PM.
$40 each class / $70 for both

Whether you are a novice interested in adult work or a seasoned pro, your online presence is an essential part of your business. PLEASE NOTE THIS IS A TWO PART CLASS! Feel free to sign up for one or both, although to get the full benefit of Mz Kim’s knowledge, we recommend both.

In this two part series, Mz. Kim, a professional Domina of 15 years, has put together key points to harness your potential to maximize and monetize your online presence. CLICK ON THE BUY TICKETS LINK TO READ THE DETAILED DESCRIPTION.

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Question from Dan Savage

· · · | Female Domination | No Comments on Question from Dan Savage

Dan Savage sent out a Tweet and asked me and several other pro-dommes to weigh in about a question sent in to him by a listener. I decided to write a post about it.

Why are dominatrices so fucking expensive? I live in a big city with lots of doms, and they’re all $250/hour or more.  On top of that, many of them ask for “tributes” on their websites and strongly imply that the hourly rate is just the beginning of their charges.  Now, I’m sure there are expenses involved in the business and I don’t know much about being a dominatrix, but it seems to me that your average dom would get a lot more business if she lowered her rates a little so many people would not get priced out of the market.  After all, basic economics tells us that non-essential services are price-sensitive.


The question of why dominatrices cost so much is legitimate… though, the condescension in tone makes this question hard to take seriously. 

Asking why they are so expensive is like walking into a Louis Vuitton store and saying, “why is everything in here so expensive.”  The simple answer is, because the market dictates it.  LV is a luxury brand.  We, the professional dommes are a highly specialized, luxury service.  There is a market that dictates both.   In a highly specialized service, specific needs and intimate desires of a submissive requires a high level of thought and attention. Lowering prices would reduce quality and thought and attention. And in this intimate world of kinks and fetishes and transcendence and bliss, would you want a reduction in the quality of thought and attention put forth by your provider?

“…(B)asic economics tells us that non-essential services are price-sensitive”.

Only people who don’t know anything about economics use this phrase.  We, the dominatrices, are the actual market.  So, when you look around to see the market showing you a particular number, maybe it isn’t the worker who is overcharging.  Others in the thread have already outlined the steep costs of equipment, rentals, training, education, clothing, tools, toys, societal and criminal risks.  I won’t go into those.   What I am focusing on more is the real question. 

“…(I)t seems to me that your average dom would get a lot more business if she lowered her rates a little so many people would not get priced out of the market.” 

The thing that I dislike the most is not even the self-centered, self-benefiting nature of the idea that rates should be lowered.   Most of us are looking for a good deal.  We all like to pay less.  If I could get a pair of Louboutins or a car for less than market price, I would do that. 

What is really grating is the unspecified amount of “a little”.  What’s a little?  Should dommes  lower their rates to whatever you, the domme bargain-hunter decides is within your comfort zone?  What is that number?  And how did you come to it?  Who are you speaking for when you talk about the “many people” who are being priced out of the market? 

This isn’t about other people or even economics. This is about you pushing your own limitations and selfishness under the guise of economics and a market.  As you said, you have no understanding of what it takes to run a business as a pro-domme.  It’s not my job or my desire to teach you about this. You simply want the rates to be lower because you are uncomfortable with your own lack of resources, lack of skills in budgeting & saving.  So, when you see that the market is at a certain price, maybe it’s not the market with the problem.

Asking why something is so expensive isn’t going to get you closer to your goal.

I am primarily an online domme. The cost of entry (to a session with me) is generally lower because you can begin talking with me, and schedule shorter phone or cam sessions and spend less than the 1 hour or 2 hour minimums required by in-person dommes. So, I get fewer questions of this blamey-why-are-you-so-expensive nature because the initial amounts seem lower. However, if you add up my fees, the per minute charges, per text charges, the many other ways of interaction added up, 250 becomes a rather small number.

The upfront cost of $250/hour the listener mentions seems really steep at first. And as many have already commented in the original Twitter post, this includes so many things built into the experience.

My point is, this person is asking the wrong question. What is the real question here? Asking why something is so expensive isn’t going to get you closer to your goal.

The question should be: How do I get this experience? Simply wishing the rates to be lower because you are uncomfortable with your own limitations will not help you get what you want. Whining and complaining and giving silly economic theory will not get you what you want. Finding the domina whom you really admire and working up to her expectations, within her boundaries, and limitations… this is how you get the experience and connection you truly crave. The economics fall into place when you prioritize your own experience and the value that a domina can bring into your life.

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Monetizing Your Appeal Online

· · · · · | BDSM · Class/Workshop · femdom · teacher | 1 Comment on Monetizing Your Appeal Online

online domination class workshop

I am teaching a 2-course workshop in Portland! Saturday, December 7 @SubRosaPDX
Monetizing Your Appeal Online
Course A: 12-2 p.m.
CourseB: 3-5 p.m. Purchase your tickets here:

Whether you are a novice interested in adult work or a seasoned pro, your online presence is an essential part of your business.PLEASE NOTE THIS IS A TWO PART CLASS! Feel free to sign up for one or both, although to get the full benefit of Mz Kim’s knowledge, we recommend both.

In this two part series, Mz. Kim, a professional Domina of 15 years, has put together key points to harness your potential to maximize and monetize your online presence. CLICK ON THE BUY TICKETS LINK TO READ THE DETAILED DESCRIPTION.

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